


The Weight Of Loss

by Bananabread03



Series: Random MCU One-Shots [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Characters Are Mostly Mentioned, Drabble, Gen, Grief/Mourning, No Dialogue, Past Character Death, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), and all that came before it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2018-10-20
Packaged: 2019-08-04 17:36:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16351118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bananabread03/pseuds/Bananabread03
Summary: Thor had lost everything.And he wasn't ever able to forget it.





	The Weight Of Loss

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this earlier this week at 12:20 am so if anything doesn't quite make sense that's why. 
> 
> Also, this story is darker than anything I've ever written, just so you are aware.

Thor had been putting on a brave front for many years at this point. He had done so after Loki’s first ‘death’ the others couldn’t see him mourn. He had to stay strong to bear the weight of preparing once more to be King of Asgard.

Then he’d found out Loki was alive yet he still had that wall, that shielded how he’d missed his younger brother so.

The shield remained throughout the death of his mother, Loki’s fake death once again, his father’s, his sister’s, Heimdall, and Loki for real. 

It was true, the brave front lasted through the day. It was at night when these walls fell.

Every night something would plague his rest, whether it was the vision from years ago that he still couldn’t get out of his head, or finding his mother dead at the hands of a dark elf. Over times he had grown used to the repetitiveness of each nightmare and the effects they had on him weakened with time. 

Nowadays he’d see things more like, his father disappearing into light particles, or his sister being killed brutally by Surtur no matter how crazy she was Hela was still his sister. Or Asgard falling to pieces, or Heimdall being stabbed through the heart. After one of these dreams, he’d awaken feeling shaky and sick. 

However, it was the dreams that he saw Loki die that had the worst impact on him.

His brother had faked his death so many times that the dreams could never just pick one way for Thor to watch Loki die. 

He’d seen his brother thrown off of what was left of the Asgardian ship with a quick flick of Thanos’ wrist. 

Thor had seen Loki be killed in the exact same way as Heimdall, a stab through the heart. Whether it was the same sword or with his brother’s own dagger changed every time. 

He’d watched his brother be decapitated, burned alive, destroyed the Power Stone, torn limb from limb, or even turn to nothing as so many did on the battlefield that day.  

Don’t think he never saw Loki go the way he actually did. Thor couldn’t go a week without seeing Thanos snap his brother’s neck. 

These dreams were the hardest to come back from. After Heimdall’s death, it hit Thor very fast that Loki was all he had left. No sooner after he realized this, with a wet snap everything was gone. 

Yet, throughout every dream, Loki’s last words to Thor were always the same. “I assure you brother, the sun will shine on us again.” 

With each day that passed, it became harder and harder to believe that. 

He may be putting on a brave front for everyone else.

 

But he could never fool himself.

  
  



End file.
